Against the odds
by AshleyGraham-Crackers
Summary: yaoi, rape, slight incest. When Semei demands Soubi to do the unthinkable //Rape Ritsuka//. What will happen? Will Soubi be able to defy the one that fights to control his every thought? RitskaxSemei slightly.. RitsukaxSoubi later.
1. Chapter 1

_The fear of losing myself seems to be tearing my heart apart at the seams.. _

_Even if i did lose myself it wouldn't matter.._

_I have nothing,  
No one.. _

* * *

A few of the boy's tears spotted the page of the tattered old journal. Several of the books pages were ripped out, others were torn and spotted.  
His hands gripped the sides of the book with such force his fingers ached. This wave of depression hurt... It hurt more than the others had. It crushed his very hopes, but he still tried to fight the feelings back.  
He bit his bottom lip viciously, mentaly reasoning with himself that the words that he had scratched onto the page were not true.

But the larger, darker, pessimistic part of his consious begged to differ.

Tossing the book to the floor, he stood. He stretched his fingers, the joints popping in restraint, losinging from his recent harsh grip.  
He shrugged off all remaining feelings of his poor mood.

He knew once person cared for him.  
But that person was not his to care for..

But he couldn't help it.

A small picture on his desk reminded him of that person. A small, sad smile touched his solemn features. He lightly traced the rim of the picture frame before grabbing it off the desk to examine it closely.

The picture was recent.. it wasn't old at all. He, along with the other person in the picture, were smiling.  
The boy's dark, amythyst eyes lingered on the other face next to his in the picture.

He cringed away from the happy memories.. They were no longer relavent.  
Not as long as Semei was alive.

Semei..

The once beloved older brother. Now the hated, despised, unknown stranger that darkened the boy's every thought.  
Ritsuka trembled.. He was begining to feel the depression swell again. He was lonely.. He needed someone.. Anyone!

No.. not anyone. He only really wanted one person. A phrase played in his mind.

_I'll be there. No matter what. I'll always be there when you want me._

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Okay. I don not (no will i ever) own Loveless. Hehe.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

_I'll be there. No matter what I'll always be there when you need me._

* * *

A tall, light blonde haired man entered Ritsuka's room slowly. He found the boy huddled against the wall by his bed.  
He had known Ritsuka needed him.. He just hadn't known how much. He took a few quick steps over to the boy, scooping him gently into his arms. He slowly brushed the flowing tears off Ritsuka's cheeks before kissing him lightly. His fingers lightly touched Ritsuka's lips.

"I'm here Ritsuka, don't worry."

The boy in his arm's trembled, his lips quivering as he lifted his head, looking into Soubi's eyes. "You didn't have to come.. It's not a big deal. I'll be fine."

Seeing Ritsuka like this always hurt Soubi... It hurt him to know that Ritsuka was so frail.. so fragile. He continued to stroke the small boy's head, his fingers pausing to rub the soft cat ears that were placed ontop of the boy's head.

"Don't say that Ritsuka.." he leaned forward to press his lips against Ritsuka's.

The boy shook his head quickly, Soubi knew reasoning would not work with Ritsuka as he pressed the boy closer to his chest.  
"I-I don't need you here Soubi! I.. i was just lonely" he shook, his head pressed against Soubi's shoulder as a sob passed his lips. "You don't have to come anymore.. I shouldn't want you here."

Soubi's hands wrapped around to press against Ritsuka's back as he felt the boy push away "I'm here for you Ritsuka, you are my first priority.. you are my life"

The boy pushed at Soubi viciously as he ground his teeth togther, he growled as he nearly shouted "Thats a lie, Soubi! A lie!" the sob that shook the boy caused his whole body to tremble. he glared at Soubi, tears brimming his eyes. "Dont. say that!" he managed between clenched teeth "You don't love me as much as you love _him_" He sneered the last word, the discust in his tone was overwhelming. "I don't have you Soubi! I never will!" his small hands clutched Soubi's shoulders as he sat there "Not as long as he's alive. You'll never want me as much. I'll never have anyone! Semei has everything! I have_ nothing_!" the small boy's voice broke as he voice hitched, another sob shakeing him. "I'll never have anything.. " he whispered quietly..

Soubi stared, the anger that over took his young love surpised him. He opened his mouth to speak.. but couldn't bring himself to say anything as he saw just how hurt Ritsuka was.

"You controll me now Ritsuka"

The boy's hands clenched into fists as he pulled on hand away and pointed at the bandages wrapped tightly around Soubi's neck "He has you Soubi! no matter what you say! You know full well that if he were to ever want you.. even at this very moment.. you would go"

Soubi was shakeing his head before the boy could finish. "I don't know exactly what would happen Ritsuka.. I will nev-"

"Stop it! Just stop it! i can't take it, Soubi!"

Soubi stared into Ritsuka's eyes "If I ever left with semei.. No matter what.. I would find a way to end my time here. I would die.. just so I wouldn't have to be with him"

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

_If I ever left with semei.. No matter what.. I would find a way to end my time here. I would die.. just so I wouldn't have to be with him._

_

* * *

_

Those words stopped Ritsuka's heart, his harsh intake of breath caused his head to spin.

_Die!? No! Soubi can't die!.._

"You..." he stopped, his face palled as the words sunk in slowly! "You can't!" He stared into Soubi's eyes, attempting to understand the reason behind his words. "I don't care.. If you're with Semei. I can handle that.. I'd know you'd still be around but..If you died.." he shook his head, his forehead pressing against Soubi's as he closed his eyes "I.. I would have _nothing.._I would absolutely nothing to live for!" He broke into tears as he spoke.. his small hands pressed against the side of Soubi's face as he stared into the mans eyes "You.. Will never do that.. "

"I understand"

Ritsuka's fingers lightly ran across the edges of the bandages wrapped around Soubi's pale neck. He glared, the hate locked deep in his hear beginning to swell as he thought of his brother.  
Giving soubi up was no where near as bad as losing him completly.

"Good..." Ritsuka' tilted his head as his lips lightly brushed across Soubi's

_I wish you loved me like I love you, Soubi_

He pushed away from Soubi, an listless look hid his true emotions as he looked away "You don't have to stay anymore, I'm fine now" His hands dropped from Soubi's shoulders as he sat there looking fiercely at the ground.

Soubi nodded, he slowly placed Ritsuka on the floor. He stepped back from the boy as he smiled slightly "I'll do what ever is best for you, Ritsuka"

The man stepped towards the sliding door that led outside. He looked back, his eyes locking with Rituska's "I love you, Ritsuka..more than anything."

Soubi reached for the door handle, as he did so a sudden bone chilling realization hit him. His hand shook as it slowly pulled away from the handle.

There was someone outside of that door..

He didn't want to believe it..

* * *

Review! so have some motivation to update! Semei will deffinatly be in the next chapter. GOOD STUFF COMEING UP! review!! Hehe.

Yaaooiii

Okay okay! reviews! hehe ^_^

Love you all who put me on the story alert!!


	4. Chapter 4

AN: I hope this chapter is so much better. I really actually like it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ xxx ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_He didn't want to believe it.._

_

* * *

_A calm laugh echoed throughout the room. Even though the laugh was out of amusement it made Soubi involuntary tremble. What ever was causing the laugh, was not in fact funny.. but most likely serious. The person behind the door had a twisted sense of humor. Soubi tensed as he heard Ritsuka's sudden frightened gasp from behind him. But he stood there, motionless, unable to do anything as the door slid open completely revealing a tall, beautiful dark haired figure.  
Time seemed to stand still for Soubi as the other man stepped through the door. A small whimper once again sounded from behind him.

"Semei.." Soubi stated simply.

There was a slight scuffling noise as Ritsuka attempted to put as much space between him and his brother as the small room allowed. His back was soon pressed against the far wall, he slid to his knees slowly to sit on the floor. He trembled as he continued to push against the wall, whishing silently that it would move.. and allow him the means to escape.

A bemused expression lit Semei's face, his dark amythist eyes flashed from Ritsuka, then to Soubi. As he looked at Soubi his expression shifted. The look he gave told the fighter he was a neusance.. a wretched, vile, _valueless_ neusance... his very existance was pointless. Semei's cold, hatefilled eyes remaind on Soubi's face momentarily as his lips parted to speak  
"Shut the door now, Soubi." His tone was heavy with authority. It was as though he were speaking to a dog... not a human. Soubi (of course) obyed silently, sliding the door shut behind Semei. He stepped back, he gaze on the floor as he waited for Semei to speak again. But nothing more was said.  
After a few long seconds Semei smiled, he pulled his fingers through his dark, black hair as his gaze returned to defensless younger brother.

"_I love you more than anything._" Semei laughed as he said this. The sound was harsh, mocking. His eyes were cold. "Oh, Soubi." He continued, sighing slighlty as he threw a glance back at the silent fighter. "It seems I have let this go on to long."

He looked at Ritsuka again, a smile now on his lips. "Lieing to Ritsuka like this. It's unacceptable."

"Semei, I-" Soubi tried but was quickly cut off.

"Shut up." Semei answered simply. "I did not ask you for an explination. So say nothing. Stand there quietly" The seemigly happy expression did not match his tone of voice. The combination was menacing... threatening.

Ritsuka sat there slowly making sence of what was happening. He suddenly tensed again as Semei took a step twords him.

_no. NO!.. Why did he have to come here.. why now.._

Semei stopped his advance. Realization lit his face as he smirked. "You're here without permission, Soubi" His eyes turned to the fighter behind him, his expression suddenly cold, Then a smile quickly replaced it again as he resumed to gaze at the small boy pressed against the wall.  
"Ritsuka.. little brother... Come here." The smile that spread across Semei's face was absolutely terrifying.  
Ritsuka didnt budge. A look of pure fear was etched on his face. He shook his head quickly, rejecting Semei's demand.

Semei's composed face faltered slightly as he turned his head slighlty to speak to Soubi. But he didn't bother to look at the blonde man. "Well Soubi" he stated. Obvious anger covered his usually calm tone. "Since you _love_ Ritsuka so much I wan't you to do something."

Soubi stood there nodding silently, awaiting the request as he quickly stole a glance at Ritsuka just as Semei started to speak again.

"I want you to take his ears."

* * *

1 review! 1 review is no fun!! But I appreciate it non the less!

Thank you for all the views. AND! for all the story alerts and author alerts. you are all so ammazzeeinng you make me feel so happy!

I'm sure the next chapter will be up next week. maybe sooner.. if ya review! ^_^ jk even if you don't i'll still update.

Hope you enjoyed this. It's only going to get better.. well.. technically.. worse since poor Ritsuka T_T


	5. Chapter 5

To long. had to make it two chapters. I'll post the next one in like.. and hour.

xxxxxxxxxxxx~

_I want you to take his ears._

* * *

Soubi swore he felt his heart stop as those words rang through his mind. His head tilted forward as he stared at the floor. For a few seconds the room was absolutely silent, then Soubi started to shake his head slowly. He refused to even look up at Semei.

"n. no.... No" Soubi managed. The sound was no more than a whisper.  
The fighters face contorted suddenly in obvious pain. Biting his lower lip viciously, he regained composure has blood began to seep through the bandages that wound tightly around his neck.

Ritsuka gasped, releasing the breath that he had been holding for what seemed like hours.

_Soubi would never do that to me._

He almost smiled at Semei... knowing Soubi would continue to deny that demand.

A cheerless smile flashed across Semeis face as he shook his head, his eyes finally looking in the fighter's direction. "How stupid." He laughed shortly, his eyes closed as he smiled again.. wider this time.. His tone of voice now cheerful. "You'll pay for that, Soubi." The man's head now turned to his little brother. He continued forward.

Ritsuka's heart skipped with Semei's advancing footsteps. He slumped against the wall as Semei was suddenly smiling down at him. The boys trembling fingers clawed at the floor as Semei leaned down further, laughing quietly.  
A hand reached out and forced Ritsuka's chin to tilt upwards. The boy repsonded by pulling away, but another hand pressed firmly against the side of his face,ceasing any movement. Ritsuka closed his eyes tightly, not wanting to meet Semei's amused gaze. What ever Semei had planned now was not good, and this terrified the boy to the point where he felt tears begin to brim in the corners of his eyes. He tensed as he felt Semei shift to lean down on one knee. Suddenly, Ritsuka felt his brothers breath on his ear, and he jumped as Semei whispered breathlessly. "How long do you think this will continue, Ritsuka." The way Semei said his name made the boy shake. The recent built up tears began to flow down his cheeks as his brothers fingers began to rub his soft, black ears as he continue to hold the boy's head firmly in place. "Its only going to hurt you, Ritsuka.... And I don't want anyone to hurt you."  
Ritsuka didn't have to look at Semei to know he was smiling.

_He's enjoying this... _

His brothers lips brushed across his ear, causing the boy's body to tense up.

_This isn't right! He can't do this!_

Ritsuka opened his tear filled eyes as he chocked out a frightened sob. His gaze fell on the silent man standing in the far corner of the room. Soubi was still staring at the floor. Drops of blood had reached the collar of his shirt, staining it red. He was bleeding badly. The once white bandages were now a deep crimson in color. Semei's words snapped Ritsuka's attention back. "You know I'd never hurt you." Semei's fingers brusehd down his brother's cheek. "I'm your older brother, Ritsuka. I love you."

* * *


	6. Chapter 6

If you though it was creepy before!! Ohhh just wait. (ps. Thanks to Tsuki. I got.. well she gave me loooots of good stuff to make Semei so.. uhm... well creepy!) I love you Sister!

xxxxxxxxxx

_I'm your older brother, Ritsuka. I love you._

_

* * *

_

That word - "_love"- _Sounded wrong, almost corrupt... Coming from Semei.

"And it's real love." He continued. The fingers that held under Ritsuka's chin began to move, stroking him lightly in that sensitive spot. The boy's lips parted in response as a small whimper escaped. "Unlike that of the people that wish to con you for your beauty." Semei's tone of voice dropped, expressing obvious discust as he finished.  
His lips lightly pressed against the boy's cheeks as he pulled away to stare into his brother's eyes. A finger moving up from the boy's chin to brush across his parted lips. "I will always take care of you." He added in a whisper. He leaned closer, his lips not even inches away from Ritsuka's. "No one can measure up to how I feel. You don't need anyone else's fake emotion. May I remind you that your name is in fact love_less_, but I love you anyways dear Ritsuka."

Ritsuka whined loudly as Semeis hands released his face, but soon firmly gripped his waist, pulling him up as he stood. Semei's arms constricted around him as their lips met. He proceeded to kiss Ritsuka deeply even as the boy pushed to get away, but his arms shoved his brother tightly against his chest.  
Semei turned, taking a step to the side, now holding Ritsuka over the bed. His tongue licked his little brother's lower lip before he smiled, whispering against Ritsuka's parted lips. "If Soubi truly loved you he would have agreed to my command" He kissed Ritsuka quickly before sighing, leaning down to place the small boy on the bed beneath him.

"It seems I'll have to take matters into my own hands."

* * *

short. I know but i kinda want the next chapter to be super long. And yes. things are getting good and i love it!

Read! enjoy! review? Hehe ^_^ I'm not leading poor Ritsuka to his doom... You'll just have to see!


	7. Chapter 7

* * *

Okay. I'm a totall moron. I mean.. I read loveless and completely forgot how to spell Seimei's name... The whole.. two "i" thing really screwed me up. And once I found out (my friend who proof read my story kept telling me.. and you know i kept forgetting. then I saw my recent comment. lol Luckily i started writing this with his name actually spelled right!!) i had to continuesly remind myself it was Seimei not semei. Anyways, This is a rewrite of sucky beyond belief chapter 7. I took a very very long.. well i guess you could call it a hiatus.. to write this. plus i've been banned from the computer for three weeks and had to redownload everything but anyways!! I apologize to everyone for my mistake on the spelling of an important charaters name. My mistake. Thank you for not hating me! ^_^ :)

Here is the "recent" chapter.

* * *

_"It seems I'll have to take matters into my own hands... "_

* * *

_xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

After a few dreadfully long seconds, Seimei's mood shifted again. The expression that was now on the man's face was blank as he stood over the bed. His head turned twords the tall fighter in the corner. Semei tilted his head to the side as he glared, unsympathitic, into Soubi's eyes, his lips curved into a cynical smile as he spoke.

"I hope you don't mind watching, Soubi." He turned to gaze down at Ritsuka.. His hand reached down to lightly caress the boy's cheek. He smiled as his brother shook with fear, looking up at him with tear filled eyes.  
"I wouldn't wat you to miss any of this."  
The hand moved to brush across Ritsuka's lips "After all... You claimed to love Rituska before.. I hope you understand your lack to obey me will only hurt him."

Ritsuka stared in Soubi's man seemed to be looking through everything... most likely trying to block it all out..  
The boy shook with a small sob as he looked at Soubi's helpless, almost childlike expression.

He knew Soubi couldn't help him...

All to quickly Ritsuka was jostled. Semei had sat down on the bed, his arms were soon wrapped around Ritsuka, pulling te boy onto his lap.  
He firmly pressed his little brothers back against his chest.  
A discusting feeling twisted through Ritsuka's stomach. He was all to aware of his brothers sick intentions..  
A cool hand slid across his neck, turning his head to the side then firmly holding it in place. Semei's tongue slowly slide across the enstive skin on Rituska's neck, just behind his ear. The feeling that shot through the small boy caused him to automatically stiffen against his brother. He began to tremble as he arched his back in an attempt to push away from his brother's relentlessly restraining arms.  
He began to sob... The situation was aboslutely hopeless..

And Soubi had to _watch _all of this...

Seimei's staggered breath was in his ear. The sound discusted the boy.

It was wrong to have his brothers hands resting around his waist... his brothers lips silently pressing against the side of his jaw...

It was wrong!  
But there was nothing he could do....

He closed his eyes, attempting to at least block out what was happening to him. Ritsuka knew that Seimei wanted to struggle...maybe if he didnt it would end sooner.  
The hand under the boy's chin forced his head in a different direction and this time... he didn't struggle.

Ritsuka shivered, his borhters lips were now pressing against his own. Tears slid down his cheeks as Seimei's tongue pressed against his lips... forcing them apart.  
A sob caught in his throat. Seimei's tongue began roughly moving in his mouth.. He fought back the feeling that made him want to throw up. -- (this is where i stopped last time)

Seimei pulled away slowly, sighing.. The sound was content. He smile, his lips still lisghtly pressed against Ritsuka's as he spoke.  
"I am glad to see you are cooperating."  
Ritsuka refused to even utter a word in responce but his head shook slowly. Seimei's fingers began to slowly caress under his chin, across his cheek. The small boy pressed his lips tightly together as he felt Seimei's tongue slowly slide across them

This was sick. He couldn't take it anymore.

Ritsuka was still pressed tightly against Seimei bu he managed to turn his head away from his borhters demanding kiss - if you could even call it a kiss.. It was awful. - The boy's eyes warily searched the face of the tall blonde man across the room. The man seemed to be staring at the floor, not seeing it.. His mind was obviously elsewhere agian...

Tuning out what was happening right infront of him...

Seimei chuckled slightly. He pushed Ritsuka back until the small boy's back was pressed firmly against the matress beneath them. He leaned forwared over his little brother, his hair sweeping arcoss the boy's forehead as he kissed the black ears that were placed ontop of his head.

"These useless tributes to your childhood will be gone soon, Ritsuka.. I love you.. So I can take them..... I'm the only one that deserves them, Ritsuka.. "  
Seimei's warms breath caused the fuzzy ears to twitch as he continued, whispering this time.  
"Thats why I still have mine, you see?" He smiled, obviously pleased with something. "Because I only love you, Ritsuka."  
His usually calm tone was suddenly harsh and Ritsuka began to tremble.  
"No one else means anything to me.. " Seimei scofffed, almost laughing. "Everyone else is worthless... But you, Ritsuka... " He sighed, seemingly more relaxed now. "you matter to me." With that, his lips moved down Ritsuka's cheek, his chin, stopping at his neck. Seimei shifted his weight, holding himself up barely an inch above his little brother.  
One of Seimei's hands slid to rest behind his little brother's nekc, the other slowly slid down the boy's shoulder. Ritsuka could now feel his brother's body pressing ontop of his own, not enough to hurt him, but enough to prevent any movement.

The small boy shuddered suddenly as Seimei's fingers slid across his skin, just above his waist line. Seimei's smile curved, almost evily, as he all but purred with enjoyment. His prying fingers slipped into Rituska's pants.  
Ritsuka's already shallow breathing completely stopped as his mind finally wrapped around the face that Seimei's hand was slowly stroking him inside his pants. The nerve splitting feeling that shot through him caused him to let out a low whimper. He bit his lip as he pushed against Seimei.

He almost growled;  
"Get off me...! Stop...... stop.... " He contiued to struggle as he cried out. "Stop it, please!" He hated begging.. But his voice broke at the last word as Seimei's hand wrapped around him beneath his pants.

The sudden cry from the boy that resulted from the action was cut off quickly as Seimei pressed his lips against his.  
Ritsuka's voice hitched in his throat as Seimei's tongue slid across his own...

Seimei pulled away slowly and smiled.  
"I wouldn't scream, Ritsuka. If you do.. I will stop you." Seimei's smile twisted into a wicked grin as his tongue slid across Ritsuka's trembling lips.  
"And I wont' be gentle... So make this easier for yourself."  
Seimei laughed quietly as he waited for a responce from Ritsuka... The boy whimpered quietly and Seimei's hand slowly pulled out from his underwear.

"Now..." Seimei stated quietly as his fingers wandered idly over Ritsuka's inner thigh. "I wasn't you to hold still.. Do you think you can do that, Ritsuka?"  
The boy in question only stared into Seimei's eyes..  
It was obvious he was scared.

Seimei sighed "Please, Ritsuka..... just listen. It will make this so much easier.." As he said this he flashed a gentle smile. This only scared Ritsuka more.

Seimei sat up.  
"Now, turn over to layon you stomach."  
Ritsuka couldn't respond. He began to tremble as Seimei sighed before demanding him to turn over again.  
It was harder than nessesary for Ritsuka to turn his stiff body over.

He didn't like this possition.

He couldn't see what was going on....

Seimei laughed breathlessly as his hands slid around Ritsuka's waist to unbutton his pants.  
"Good boy.." He stated as he gegan to pull down the small boy's pants.  
When Ritsuka's pants were around his ankles, Seimei's fingers traced down the back of the boy's thigh.

Ritsuka closed his eyes tightly. He was surprised when Seimei's fingers brushed across his lips.  
"Open your mouth." His brothers voice instructed. Ritsuka only pressed his lips together into a tight line.  
"Have it your way." Seimei scoffed. He pulled his fingers away and sat up, unbuttoning his own pants and pulling them down.

Seimei's usually emotionless voice was harsh. He almost hissed the words at his younger brother as he grabbed the boys hips, pulling them up off the bed.  
"For that Rituska.. This will be much more painfull."

Ritsuka gasped as his lower body was pulled up. He attempted to move forward, but was roughly shoved back into place. He trembled as he heard Seimei laugh.  
His tone was assulting, almost cruel;  
"You must really want this to be painful, Ritsuka.."

Ritsuka didn't have to look at Seimei to know he was grinning.  
"Even if you don't enjoy this.. I know I will.."

Ritsuka came to a last ditch effort to get away...

If he wasn't conscience..  
he wouldn't feel anything...

He held onto this hope as he began to hold his breath. Time seemed to move slowly as Ritsuka's head began to spin. He thought he felt Seimei shift behind him but he wasn't sure..

In fact, he didn't care.

He felt his eyes begin to close. A few tears slid down his cheeks as he continued to hold his breath.  
The pain was bad. But he knew wat Seimei would do would be worse.

_Why... Why Seimei?_

There was a few quick foot steps as Soubi's hand reached forward to grip Seimei's shoulder.

There was a dull _**snap**. _The sound seemed to ring off the walls...

That was the last thing Ritsuka heard before everything went black.

* * *

Ahh! This is quite easily the MOST TIME I HAVE PUT INTO A CHAPTER EVER . But! I can say.. that I am proud of the result ^_^.

So so so much better 3 3 I love soubi lol

I will have the next chapter up by next week. I'm still coming up with more idea's for it and its not finished yet but I'm working on it! Don't hit me or anything rash like that.

Comments please!? Yes!! I love reading them lol. They are so cute and funny and they just make me want to write more!

- Update next week-


	8. Chapter 8

Okay.. I wasn't abducted by aliens.. Although that would have been totally cool. What did happen to me is that I encountered writers block. A huge one. I had no idea what direction to take my writing in and I got scared. But look at me! I'm back now! And.. I'm writing again. Lucky for all of you… I have my notes from this story and I can now finish it. ITS BEEN SO LONG!

Anyways. Thanks for the reads.. The reviews and the push I needed to get my butt back in gear and update this darn story! It's not fair that I know the ending and you don't! I almost cried when I saw how much everyone wanted me to update.

Anyways.

This new chapeter will be up by Friday. If it isn't.. You can shoot me. Deal?


	9. Chapter 10

Chapter 8/9.. Finally? I honestly don't think I could stress the word "Finally" enough. Although I do have the whole story done now.. I failed.. ONCE AGAIN (ugh I'd love to be shot right now XD) To update on time. I am really.. all to glad that you have been here and viewing my story even though it has been at a dead stand still for so long! I mean jeeze I posted this thing on my birthday last year and my birthday has gone and passed.. once again -_- Anyway! This… is what you have been waiting for! Although it is a slow chapter at least things are getting going! ;)

I'm about sick of this process. I typed this whole thing last night.. I honestly wanna shoot myself. Here it goes for the 3rd time -_-

* * *

_Is this what it feels like to die...?_

_Is is really over?_

_xxxxxx_

Ritsuka felt oddly heavier than normal... He noted this and also that the fact that his body had the sensation you get after your leg falls asleep and starts to regain blood flow again. But it wasn't just his leg that had this feeling, it was his whole body.

Was it all over, this nightmare that his life had suddenly plunged into?

He didn't want to move for fear _he'd _still be there. Him... Seimei. The once praised older brother.

"Some brother. If he was truly as great as everyone thought he was he wouldn't be trying to sexually a-assault... me... "

Ritsuka's inner train of thought stalled slightly as his mind attempted to wrap around the consept of his brother... and sexual assault.. at the same time. It didn't make his head any less clouded... in fact it honestly made it ten times worse.

Slowly another thought struck him through the temporary mind block the previous thought had caused.

Maybe he _was _lucky. Maybe his horrible, empty life was over. Maybe he had bored Seimei enough to cause his "Brother" (The thought of even still calling him that was making the boy feel faintly ill) to bring it to a quick end.

But sadly... The exhausted boy could still move his fingers...

_So the pain won't end now... _

He didn't want to open his eyes. He was quite honestly afraid of what he would see if he did. So he relied on his other sense for a time. Well, for one, the room smelled damp. The air seemed to be slightly heavier than usual. Like after a terrible downpour of rain... That awful humidity that weighed down on you, always damp. It also smelled slightly musty... it smelled like blood. A lot of blood. And... was that smoke?

And there was breathing... Deep breathing. but i was only coming from one person.

A small lump began to lodge it self in Ritsuka's throat. He bit his lip slightly, his eyes closed tighter. He didn't know whether he wanted to puke or cry...

If there was only one person in the room with him. That could only mean one of two things.

Either Seimei was still there,in the same room with him, and Soubi was... was..

He couldn't even bring himself to think it. He would never allow his mind to picture something so horrible... so painful.

He didn't want to think of what that meant if Seimei was still in the room. Because if Seimei was still here Soubi wasn't. To think about the man he cared so much about lifeless... and broken... It made Ristuka want to scream. So he quickly moved passed the thought.

So.. Either Seimei was there.. or Soubi was there and Seimei had left. Probably finished what he wanted and left, bored. But not without a greater fight. No, that wasn't like Seimei to just leave. Maybe he was dead. Frankly, either way, Ristuka didn't really care.

_But that smell of smoke..._

Seimei didn't smoke. Nor had he ever smoked. The frigidly cold man was to obsessed with perfection, with good health and clean looks. He would never take up a nasty habit. Infact Ristuka didn't put it past Seimei to flat out hate people who smoked. Seimei hated lots of people...

But Soubi _did _smoke...

And with that last thought Ristuka's dark, ice blue eyes, finally opened.

If Soubi was here... Everything would be okay now.

xxxxxxxx

* * *

Alrighty! You have no idea how ticked I am at this stupid internet. I typed this all last night at 3 in the morning... to click save.. And my computers interenet connection fail. Yeah.. -_- I was NOT HAPPY. I thought it was nice and posted it anyways. But now.. I find out this morning that it didn't XD Oh well. actually I'm kinda happy you didn't read last nights version. This one is sooo much more detailed! yay.

Anyways. The wait is over. My writers block is gone and I am ready to write!

Gotta love my fans 3 even though I posted late you all still read and leave comments.

-Later ;) Keep the reviews coming. Thats what I like reading.


	10. Chapter 11

After much.. struggle. I finally decided to get my butt in gear and git this story finished! now comes some sexy stuff D: I love writing sexy stuff. Although it's not in this chapter.. It's in the chapter after the next :D I figured if I add one chapter every week I'll be good. gotta keep you reading somehow!

Anyways. Thanks so much for the reviews :DDD I love reading them. And it means so much when someone tells me I have a talent for writing. Because I mean I love doing it. at least I'm not completely awful at it.

anyways! read and enjoy.. AND REVIEW. xD

* * *

xoxoxox

_You have no reason to cry now, Ritsuka... I'm here.._

_

* * *

_

He finally opened his eyes, although blurry at first they sought out what they had opened to find. A thin, blonde man leaning against the wall… While the boys eyes continued to adjust to the dim, orange sunset light streaming through the large window, he watched the man. Although the figure seemed unmoving at first Ritsuka soon caught the faint lift of the man's chest.

_At least he's still breathing…_

But that only brought temporary relief to the small boy… Yes, at least Soubi was breathing… But there was blood everywhere, spilling from the various cuts that wound around the man's neck, arms, and torso.

Seimei had left… But with a fight.

Ignoring the light headed feeling his head seemed to be fogged with… He lifted up out of the bed, rocking into a standing position as he stumbled over, almost blindly, to where the man – that he cared so much for… - sat, bleeding.

Soubi's arms opened automatically, giving the boy the go ahead to fall into them… And he did, holding onto Soubi tightly.

"y-you're still here, I .. figured you would have left.. because.. " the small boy's fuzzy cat-like ears twitched as he sat there, trying to form a acceptable sentence, although it was most likely hard to understand him, anyways… for his head was buried in Soubi's blood stained shirt…

"he hurt you.. he hurt you badly" He said lamely, not really expressing exactly all the things he wanted to say… such as… how much he cared about the man…

The mans response was only a whisper

"I would never let him hurt you"

And through all the pain the man smiled, pulling Ritsuka close as he stroked the small boy's soft, dark hair.

"He won't be back for you, I will never let him touch you, Ritsuka. I'm here for you now. And I will never stand useless to help you." He laughed lightly as he seemed to remember something funny…

"I never thought I would be able to betray someone I stood by for so long."

The small boy's lips quivered as his head lifted to look into the man's eyes… So many things were running through his head at that time. It made it extremely hard for the small boy to focus… But he did. On one thing… And that was Soubi. Although there was still some worry, due to the fact that the man had wounds that obviously needed to be tended to… There was more relief than anything. After all that pain… all that torture. Ritsuka could finally call Soubi his. And it would always be that way…

He smiled, as tears filled his eyes.

He blushed as the mans fingers, gently lifted his chin, bringing the small boys face closer to his.

"You have no reason to cry now, Ritsuka… I'm here…"

And with that, Soubi leaned in, kissing the small boy gently at first… then a bit more deeply.


End file.
